Hello and welcome to Day 39 of this long football World Cup and one of the last editions of Offside. It has been so much fun, and it’s almost time to say fare-thee-well to hackneyed sleep cycles. Also to the best readers in the world who have kept this columnist on his toes with sharp feedback like: “we expect much better from you” or “written by AI”.But let’s get down to brass tacks. The Star Wars prequels are much better than critics claim. The originals, while legendary, had lightsaber battles that were less threatening than a vigorous dandiya night. The sequels are a cynical Disney money-grab in the post-Lucas era that is very hard to care about. It’s hardly surprising that a green puppet and a man in a tin foil suit are more popular with Star Wars fans than whatever is going on with Kylo Ren and Rey.The prequels, on the other hand – much maligned when they were released – stand the test of time, particularly the scene when Anakin Skywalker goes over to the Dark Side and it’s up to his master and brother Obi-Wan Kenobi to stop him by engaging him about a political debate about democracy and republicanism.There’s a distinct Revenge of the Sith feel to this final except its two protagonists are from La Masia, not the Jedi temple. Lamine Yamal (the new Chosen One from La Masia) must face off against the man whose legacy he has inherited: Lionel Messi. Or if you prefer two other Force-sensitive individuals: Yoda vs Baby Yoda, the wizened old master of the Force against another creature from his species.Much has been written about The Baptism of Yamal by ‘Saint’ Messi and it will be a remarkable meeting when football’s past, present and future collide in New Jersey. But before that, let’s run the ruler over what FIFA calls the “Bronze Final”, and Konaté calls a ‘chocolate medal’.England vs France: Action recap (6-4)England vs France, as Offside explained yesterday, is a 900-year-old derby and it served up another sumptuous battle, though it’s unlikely to make it to the Bayeux Tapestry, the 70-metre account of William the Conqueror’s invasion that came home recently after a millennium in France, unlike the football.The third-place match might be the footballing equivalent of being asked to have your picture taken after getting left at the altar, but in this case, it was like those pictures that turn up in the end credits of The Hangover: complete chaos and madness as England ran out 6-4 winners in the first World Cup game to have a double-digit score since Hungary beat El Salvador 10-1 in 1982.England, taking a leaf from late-career MS Dhoni, who finds a new gear once a game is lost, flew into a 4-0 lead in the first half before France hit back in the second in a crazy game that ended 6-4.
France’s Kylian Mbappe (10) reacts after scoring his side’s third goal during the World Cup third-place playoff match between France and England. (AP Photo)
Mbappé got his two goals, making him outright the top World Cup goalscorer of all time, at least till Messi plays the final. Declan Rice scored a banger, Bukayo Saka got a hat-trick, and Bellingham scored one of the goals of the tournament. Clearly, England can turn on the Roy of the Rovers stuff when there’s nothing at stake. But that’s as much newsprint as this after-party deserves because now it’s time for the main event: Spain vs Argentina.
The big story: FIFA World Cup final 2026
Spain vs ArgentinaMonday, July 20, 12.30am ISTNew York New Jersey StadiumReferee: Slavko Vinčić (Slovenia)A beginner’s guideNow if you are just joining us – congratulations on sleeping on time and not looking like something the cat would refuse to drag in – it’s Spain vs Argentina for the final. Argentina are the holders, having won in 2022. Spain last won the trophy in 2010. Even if you haven’t followed a single game, here’s a primer:Who’s playing in the final?Argentina vs Spain. Argentina are led by Lionel Messi, who is now considered the greatest to ever play this game irrespective of what happens in this match. Spain perhaps have the more talented side, headlined by a young kid called Lamine Yamal, who just happens to play for Barcelona, where he also wears Messi’s old number 10.Wasn’t there a bath involved?Yes there was, one that Offside has labelled The Baptism of Yamal by Saint Messi. The story goes that Yamal’s parents won a raffle that would have their baby participate in a photoshoot with a Barcelona player, and that player turned out to be a 20-year-old Lionel Messi. Now, 19 years later, that baby and Messi (now 39) face off in the World Cup final. Serendipity? Yeah probably, but it’s now time for the successor to meet the master.What else should I know?The final is being held in a place we love from our favourite shows like House MD: New Jersey. The final is at MetLife Stadium but due to FIFA’s rules it has been renamed the New York New Jersey Stadium, a name that will make Ted Mosby go crying to Frank Sinatra.The referee is a gentleman from Slovenia named Slavko Vinčić who was present during a police raid at a party that involved cocaine, guns and a prostitution ring. Vinčić had nothing to do with anything going on there, though he didn’t hand out any cards there, suggesting he likes the game to flow naturally.Spain: The storylineThe World Cup final, as one wry account pointed out, is between two teams who couldn’t beat Cabo Verde in 90 minutes.Spain were held 0-0 in their first match by the Blue Sharks, then comfortably topped their group before beating Austria 3-0, sending Ronaldo home by beating Portugal 1-0, edging Belgium 2-1 and then handing France a harsh footballing lesson in the semi-final.Older Spanish sides were accused of passing teams (and fans) to boredom but the newer generation can pass, press, tackle and suffocate, and have conceded only one goal in seven matches. The Guardian’s data shows that they have conceded an xG of 2.15 across the entire tournament, the kind of border control that would make the acolytes of MAGA go weak at the knees. And among them is 19-year-old Lamine Yamal, a boy who wears Messi’s number at Barcelona, though he is more Neymar Jr as a footballer and a person.Argentina: The storylineArgentina have taken the sort of route to the final that Robert Frost would approve of: miles into the forest like they have promises to keep and won’t let us sleep. The Guardian’s David Hytner summed it up when he wrote that throughout the tournament “there has been a feeling that they (Argentina) are beatable, and yet nobody has beaten them”.The group stages, when Messi and Co sashayed through, feel aeons ago, as Argentina have had to come back from the dead in every match, leading critics to label them “VARgentina” because of the mendacious belief that Argentina are being “favoured” by FIFA. Argentina survived Cabo Verde 3-2 after extra time, came from two goals down to vanquish Egypt 3-2, beat Switzerland 3-1 after extra time and ensured it wouldn’t come home by beating England 2-1 in the semi-final.
Against England, they trailed 1-0 before Enzo Fernández equalised in the 85th minute and then Lautaro Martínez headed in the stoppage-time winner from a pinpoint Messi cross that even had newly-anointed football pundit Donald Trump gushing.Warrior watchThe temptation is to pick Yamal but Spain’s main man has been the 2024 Ballon d’Or winner Rodri, who has rediscovered his mojo in the middle of the park and makes everyone around him tick.A knee ligament injury had led many to wonder if the man who scored in the 2023 Champions League final and won Euro 2024 with Spain was back to his best, but he has been the conductor of this magnificent Spanish orchestra.Against France, he won 11 duels, completed 87% of his passes and marshalled the troops so Mbappé and Co didn’t have a meaningful chance throughout the game. He has been influence personified at this World Cup, with more touches, passes and line-breaking passes than any other player.Paul Scholes noted during a recent podcast that he had played 66 times for England and even while winning never felt in control. It says something that a maestro like Scholes, a master of control, would say that. Thankfully for Spain, they have a player like Rodri who can almost always ensure they are in complete control. Just ask France.
As for Argentina, the main man still is Messi.Seven years ago, Sean Ingle in The Guardian, while echoing journalist David Hepworth’s postulation about The Beatles, argued that despite all the “superlatives, hype and awards”, Lionel Messi was “underrated”. That was the year Messi scored 52 goals and provided 26 assists for club and country, and won five trophies with Barcelona, including the continental treble. But that’s not what the mind remembers from that season; it remembers one particular instance: Messi’s ‘ankle-breaker’ goal against Jérôme Boateng, who fell flat to the ground, flummoxed by Messi’s sudden change in direction and likely wishing that the ground would swallow him. Even today, that clip defies belief.Years later, Messi is wizened but still not quite done and while he might not be dribbling past defenders like they were traffic cones, he remains a magician on the pitch, particularly when someone riles him up.The term pibe defines the soul of Argentine football and its “street baller” archetype: a young, passionate, poor kid from the barrio who plays with unmatched creativity. Messi might no longer be young or poor but his creativity and passion on the field still remain unmatched, as he has shown in this World Cup with eight goals, four assists, 34 shots and the highest individual xG of the tournament.
France’s Michael Olise (11) tackles Spain’s Rodri (16) during the World Cup semifinal soccer match between France and Spain in Arlington, Texas, near Dallas, Tuesday, July 14, 2026. (AP Photo/Sam Hodde)
Battle planSpain are the sort of team whose contingency plans have contingency plans, and if those contingency plans don’t work out, they always have Merino to score a late goal.For Spain, Rodri is key and it’s unlikely that Lionel Scaloni will deploy a defensive forward to blunt his threat the way Sir Alex Ferguson did against Andrea Pirlo with Park Ji-sung in a Champions League tie many aeons ago.If Argentina do find a way to blunt Rodri, they will have sous-conductor Fabián Ruiz to deal with. Meanwhile, expect Olmo to float into the space between midfield and attack while Yamal distorts the right side of the pitch.Spain will look to make Argentina run and run in a sadistic game, with Tagliafico likely to be the man tasked with tracking Yamal. Spain could also switch play through Rodri and Fabián to the other side. Oyarzabal’s role is crucial and he will drag Romero or Lisandro Martínez out of their comfort zones, leaving gaps for Olmo and Yamal.Without the ball, Spain ought to give Messi the Mbappé treatment: block the road so the Ferrari can’t reach. De la Fuente has already said Spain will not man-mark Messi, which is the obvious choice because you don’t want to anger the dragon, the way Bellingham did, launching Argentina’s comeback and a thousand memes.One can expect Argentina to start the game the way they did against England: inject a little chaos with their physicality. De Paul, Enzo Fernández, Mac Allister or whoever is picked to start will turn the middle of the pitch into a battleground and harangue the Spanish team in the early minutes when the referee is reluctant to show cards.Messi will drift into his half-spaces and all Argentina need are a few moments of Messi receiving while facing goal. It will be up to Scaloni to decide if he wants more legs, more chaos or more control. De Paul gives Argentina bite in the early stages. Giuliano Simeone could give them more running power. Lautaro from the start offers more threat but can be effective at the death too. The problem is Spain could be well ahead for 80 minutes and still be left fuming when Argentina decide to go full Hulk Hogan.For Spain, the goal is control; for Argentina, it is flipping the switch. Finals have an odd way of ripping the script apart.Walk down memory laneSpain and Argentina have met 14 times, with six wins each and two draws. Their previous World Cup meeting came in 1966, when Argentina beat Spain 2-1 in Ozzy Osbourne’s spiritual home: Villa Park. Their last meeting was a friendly in 2018 that Spain won 6-1, though Messi didn’t play. Interestingly, this is the first time in World Cup history that the two reigning continental champions, Spain from Europe and Argentina from South America, are going head-to-head in a World Cup final.Off the fieldThere’s an interesting theory about the internet called the Toaster F**** Syndrome.For those not familiar, the Reddit theory refers to the idea that before the internet, departures from normative behaviour were shut down in real life by peers. For example, if an individual expressed a desire to perform coitus with a toaster, he would be told to get a life. But on the internet, thanks to peer-to-peer sharing, the same desire means one can now find a thousand people with the same belief system. Before you know it, there are millions of perennially online folks who are convinced that the desire to perform coitus with an electric appliance is normal behaviour, and anyone who points out that it’s bizarre is a génocidaire par excellence.
Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, his wife Sara, Argentina’s President Javier Milei and Argentina’s General Secretary of the Presidency Karina Milei take part in a recorded rehearsal for the upcoming Israel Independence Day ceremony in Jerusalem Sunday, April 19, 2026. (AP Photo/Ohad Zwigenberg)
The same goes for injecting one’s personal politics into everything, including the World Cup final, which is being held up as a political Rorschach test involving colonialism, decolonialism, migration, Israel, Palestine, Javier Milei, Donald Trump and Benjamin Netanyahu.In this collective mass delusion, the Argentina team are a “pro-Zionist” project whose goal is world domination through Messi and VAR. The only thing standing against them is multicultural Spain, the most pro-Palestine European nation, which isn’t surprising given that the Iberian Peninsula was ruled by Muslim dynasties for eight centuries before they were pushed out by Catholic monarchs.The fact we should all remember is that whoever wins between Spain and Argentina gets the football World Cup trophy, not personal validation of one’s politics.Dinner table conversationNo matter what happens today, there can be no debate that Lionel Messi is the GOAT. To disagree means you are either Piers Morgan or IShowSpeed, two people whose opinions on football and life can be roundly ignored.
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